Amsterdam, 22th September 2014

When I traveled to Amsterdam I was just recovering from my first ever meet&greet with Gavin that went just all bad. You can read the embarrassing story HERE if you wish.

I was pretty sore, and I just kept wishing I could turn back the time and just do everything differently. Every. Single. Thing. I felt like I was the biggest fool on the whole planet, and what made it even worse, I knew that now Gavin knew it as well. Ha.


Anyways, I was excited to travel to Amsterdam, for I hadn’t been there ever before and I was doing my Gavin-tour all by myself. I had made no plans how to get from the airport to my hotel, because I had been worrying only about my m&g. So there I was, at the airport, with no clue where to go. I got some info I should take the bus, and I did, though I hate taking buses in the regions I don’t know. For the reason I never know where to get off. Anyways, I found my hotel and the hotel was nice. The mirror was so high I felt amused when seeing myself only upwards from my shoulders.


I was confused by the Dutch subtitles in tv. We have those in Finland, too, and so I subconsciously tried to read them all the time, I couldn’t stop reading them. And I got even more confused when I understood nothing what I read. And because my concentration was so completely on the freaking subtitles, I wasn’t able to just listen what the actors spoke in English. So, I gave up, and went to bed.


The next day was the day. I had made some serious plans for the first row and so I packed up my stuff (after having a very long struggle with my suddenly bewildered hair…)


and went to the Heineken Music Hall to wait. I had never done that before, I mean, spending whole day in front of a concert hall just to be sure to be in the first row. But, what can I say. Gavin does things to me. Haha.


I met some my Twitter friends over there and I was so glad about it! I also met some other very nice girls and I had such a fun time when just standing and sitting and waiting and waiting and waiting … I also saw this beautiful little guy before he got to his new owner!

Russel the Third

It was actually very cool to wait there. People were walking by and some gave us some looks like we were the most idiotic creatures in the whole wide world, but I just laughed at them. I was just happy to be there. I was just happy to know that I was going to see Gavin again. And I was happy also for Joey, for I had missed his show in London because of my m&g. It was, umm. Interesting, I might say, you can read my first reaction for the ‘other brother’ HERE, if you wish. I’ve changed my opinion, pretty much completely about him. I’ve been playing Joey’s music like nonstop lately, and just loving it.

Distracted. Back to Amsterdam.

We didn’t see any of the band before the show, though we had hoped to. When the time for opening the doors came closer I overheard some conversations about ‘going to left and running’, and I thought it was more like a metaphor, but it turned out to be exactly like that. Everybody was just pushing and running and pushing and running. So, I ended up running, too, because I had patiently waited, what, 8 hours?? I’m not really any runner type, but I managed to push my way to the second row. That was as good as the first, because there was very short people in front of me and so I could see just prefectly. And, when there was this huge gap between the stage and the audience, there was no possibility to grab Gavin’s hand, anyways.

Oh, and I spotted Russel the First (or Second) before the show.


Finally Joey came up and I had my thing with him. Go click the previous link to find out. I was for some reason disappointed, offended and totally pissed off.


When Gavin came on stage everything changed. It was sooo amazing to see him again. It is always such a pleasure to see him. Somehow, I don’t know, it’s fun to see how similar he is to every video and picture I have ever seen. And how damned talented he is. I was like in constant awe when he sang. Leading man started the show again, and man, I love the song. I tried to take some photos, but I had only my phone, and so even if I was so close (and yet so far), the pictures are… ummh. So very blurry. But they are evidence that I actually was there. I didn’t take so many pictures, because I wanted to enjoy the real thing as much I could, but here’s some views of mine.

I was pretty much right in front of James and in the end when he threw his picks, one flied right towards me, but it dived and went missing somewhere on the floor. I was trying to find it and others, too, but nobody found it really. So, bummer. Ha.

I was amused along the show, because I knew what was going to happen next. The water bottle story was a good one, check it out HERE.

In London Gavin noticed me in the beginning, we locked eyes for a moment, and I felt like floating the whole show. This time he didn’t, even though I was in the freaking second row, not like that at least. In the very end of the show when he was standing right in front of me, I got these sudden bursts of heat on my skin, and I imagined it was caused by his gaze swiping over me. Ahaha, I sound very crazy, don’t I? Ha. Well, I was a bit disappointed that he didn’t really look at me at all, but at least I could stare at him from a very good place.

After the concert I lingered there, but the security guys were driving us away as cattle, so I reluctantly needed to bugger off. I went to the back stage door instead with some Twitter friends. We hoped to see the band members and maybe even G himself, but no luck there. I saw David and James – and Joey who was all over the place. James was in a hurry so I couldn’t get a pic with him, but with David I managed! And with Joey I was in such a state of mind I couldn’t have cared less about him. So I didn’t even try to get a picture with him. I regret that, now, but what can I say.

We stayed so long we could. We saw the huge black tour bus leave the building and everybody just took off then. I did too. Somebody said me that they have now left, and we should go home, because there’s no change to see Gavin anymore, but I felt it was somehow controversial statement, for the very same people had told me very convincingly before that Gavin was not in the tour bus in the first place when they arrived and that he would have his own private car. So, why would have he left in the tour bus, then?

Oh well. I stood there, on the empty street, in the middle of the night, in the dark, and thought ‘I know you’re still in there, mister. I hope you had a great time. You know, I did. And I’m kinda glad that you didn’t show up anymore, deeply disappointed and somehow relieved in the same time. I just wish we could meet some day again. Good night, sleep tight, my leading man.’

Yeah. I missed him already. Still missing him.

It’s not just his music, his gorgeous smile, his appearance, his character, his voice, his show, it’s also about the amazing fans and the community kind of vibe when being there as in the same tribe.

Please, Gavin, come soon back to Europe! I promise to do 3 shows next time.



we don’t ask how are you doing anymore
look in the eye
live under the same roof

independence is the greatest virtue of all
to cope all alone

but something in us
in me
misses the safe alliance
protecting from all evils
our own family people tribe

when the music rumbles
and the bass makes my chest to tremble
I am not just me
we are all together as one

your crazy screaming family

and that is good



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